| weiners but not really |
[27 Oct 2004|09:24pm] |
i havent done this in a while it feels soo weird but i gotta lot of stuff on my mind and i feel like writin soo here i am. So basically i quit my job cuz they were gay and bball is on its way. All the seniors and chuck, frank, and karl keep tellin me im on the team already. Until i see Bray say it though i dont wanna believe them cuz if i dont make it then i will go crazy. So i try not to think about it too much. Just go out there and push kids around as usual. Its kinda sad that im the strongest player in my bball class. so if i did make the team i would be only behind nick and joseph strength wise. Thats pretty nuckin futs. Alotta shit has been happening lately. HC came and went it was sweet. Ive hung out with Hacias and Karl too much too cuz ive been doing some naughty things. Crazy kids. Mostly i hung out with my niggas aka the somphmores cuz they are pretty hella sweet. Lots of stuff on my mind but i try not to let it get to me too much.
Things are different nowadays i never see Christopher or matt nemore
and i dont hang out with meghan and rachel anymore but i still love em all to death.
Mostly the ladies
lol
So yeah Boobie Miles dont need to work out cuz Boobie is plain Boobie
i love boobie miles thats for sure
but neways this mornin i got in a fight with trev and meg over bush and kerry and i totally hate bush and we argued the whole way to school. I liked it. lol
then at lunch greg asked me who i would vote for if i could and i said Kerry then our whole table got into an arguement. Of course me devin and megan won cuz we're the smart ppl at the table
idunno Bush just seems like a dumbass and he wanted to do what his dad didnt
but thats just me
who knows what will happen in the election
its supposed to be even closer than last years so that means we mite not have a president for a while.
but newho im done babbling i just felt like writing
sh town stay down
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[19 Sep 2004|01:41am] |
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mood |
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 lazy |
] |
You and me
We used to be together
Every day together always
I really feel
That I'm losing my best friend
I can't believe
This could be the end
It looks as though you're letting go
And if it's real,
Well I don't want to know
yeah i know its gay but even though we have our problems with each other the bottom line is that Rachel and Meghan i love u two and we're the FNC for life
i know nothings the same nemore but just give me some time
please and ill get everything right
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[05 Sep 2004|07:30pm] |
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i can pretend like it doesnt hurt but deep down i wanna just runaway and startover
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| blah blah |
[03 Sep 2004|12:41am] |
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I had a busy day
school went by fast and i left for an hour to get my blood drawn and when i came back i told torrence i got shot and he believed me
hahaha
then i went to the JV football game and they were whooping ass so i left
final score: 48-0 wowza
then i went to the girls JV and Varsity games and danced to headsprung and lean back and i was the entertainment for everyone for the night
then my night turned crappy and my dad yelled at me
"cuz of my tone"
wtf are u serious
then i talked to rachel and that didnt go to well cuz i messed up as usual
but rachel u know i need u more than any other person alive.
then once she went away i did too cuz i didnt feel like talking so i watched the republican convention with my parents and we were all yelling at Bush cuz hes a gay black jew
then i came back downstairs to lift weights cuz i had to keep myself busy
and now im here babbling soo ima shower then bed
peace out SH- town stay down
why'd i do what i do?
im sorry
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[30 Aug 2004|07:55pm] |
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mood |
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 pissed off |
] |
God forbid you ever had to wake up to hear the news
'cause then you really might know what it's like to have to lose
so tommarow is it huh???
10 years without ya
its not fair
its just not
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[29 Aug 2004|09:40pm] |
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mood |
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okay |
] |
at home
drawing pictures
of mountain tops
with him on top
lemon yellow sun
arms raised in a V
dead lay in pools of maroon below
daddy didn't give attention
to the fact that mommy didn't care
king jeremy the wicked
ruled his world
jeremy spoke in class today
jeremy spoke in class today
Jeremy spoke in class today
When u feel like theres no one just hang on cuz someone is always there
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[27 Aug 2004|11:24pm] |
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mood |
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 depressed |
] |
Its that feeling that dont go away
its that certain someone who just makes ur day
but its the fact that ur empty within
ur afraid of everything cuz u dont know where to begin
its when u lose someone close
its when u cry over someone u miss the most
its that pain that u carry in ur heart
its the fact that u dont know how to start
the depression pulls u apart
sometimes u think its better if u were just another statistic on a suicide chart
its when ur stuck in a rage and cant get out
u feel soo cold u just wanna shout
its that feeling of discouragement of people saying ur done
but you made it so far u almost won
its the attitude u bring to the table
for some maybe im living my own fable
u just need someone, something to rest ur head
but when it comes down to it u wish u were dead
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| wooo weeee |
[26 Aug 2004|06:56pm] |
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mood |
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 amused |
] |
school was aight i guess
i find ways to make ne class interesting
4th hour is the shit with Mario saying something stupid every 5 seconds
hes freaking HELL-arious
and meghan and nick r too cool to sit by us soo yea w/e
"hey josh 5th grade called and yeah they said to hurry ur ass up!"
-mario
then at lunch mario grabbed me and got me in a headlock and sang me a song about how great his buldge is
hahahahaha
so then after school i got felt up by my doctor and this black lady loved my air force ones
and she told me to shop at mr alans but i was thinking to myself lady im white so thats not gonna happen
haha
then after that me and my favoritest person in the world meghan went up to lifetime and worked out
woooo the one machine meghan likes and 3 miles later we left
lol
ohhh yea and i almost forgot that we spent like a half hour trying to get my car washed haha
then chris licata finally dried it
no more bird poo
i love spending quality time with Meghan :) bff shortay love ya
and tommar i think we're hittin up the gym again then goin to the game later that nite soo that outta be just a super dooooper time!!!!!!
ohhh yea
hiccup ;)
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[23 Aug 2004|12:35am] |
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mood |
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 accomplished |
] |
You's a b-writer
A Pac style taker
I'll tell you to face, you ain't nothing shit but a faker
Fuck you and your mother fucking mama.
We gonna kill all you mother fuckers.
hit em up :)
wow if u only knew
Hay-zeus n Pooky gangsta to the core
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| when shit hits the fan ur my helping hand |
[21 Aug 2004|01:11am] |
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mood |
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calm |
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maybe its cuz of my outlook on life
or maybe its cuz i just cant cut it with this knife
all i know u make me wanna be alive
im in this moment and i never wanna die
maybe its cuz ur so good to me
or maybe its cuz u believe in thee
all i know u make me wanna cry
cuz ur soo good to me and i dont know why
maybe its cuz i dont know what to do
and maybe its cuz im lucky to have u
all i know is i never wanna go
cuz when ur not with me i feel soo low
maybe its cuz im lonely
or maybe its cuz i need u as my homie
all i know is i love ur teasing
and if it werent for u, i wouldnt be breathing
i hope everyone see's this cuz Meghan Shankie is the best friend a guy can have
love ya shortay
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| godfather buried alive |
[20 Aug 2004|12:25am] |
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mood |
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blank |
] |
The day I stuck my head out my mother's womb
I was doomed
Repeatin' the lords prayers sittin' in this court room
I'm cursed
We havin dreams of leavin here up in a hearse
I wonder when I close my eyes will it hurt?
I'm suicidal
Can't take this pressure or this pain
Too much for these young eyes
Real G's don't die, that's a lie
Cuz I'm dyin inside, cryin' inside
Look at me sweatin', palms shakin, hidin' inside
-SHYNE-
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| listen when i speak cuz u mite miss somethin unique |
[18 Aug 2004|12:49am] |
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mood |
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sad |
] |
i just cant put the words that say
how im missin u more n more everyday
and how that memory is stuck with me and it just plays and plays
and it runs through my head for days n days
i feel alone trapped in this world without u
and i wanna believe that ur still alive cuz its all about u
but when my dreams r over and i awake
the blood rushes and i get a headache
cuz i really believe that god made a mistake
takin u from the world now im in a bottomless lake
im alone taking it day by day
and its my best friends that r there for me to pave the way
cuz i need to figure my life out on my own
but u need ur homies to fall on when u feel all alone
thinkin back in the day
when we used to play
but these memories of u r fading away
cuz everyone in life at some point just wants to let go
cuz i just wanna see u again it hurts yo
i think bout the time
when u were prolly nine
and i u let me sleep on the top bunk
just to let me scream for u in the mornin to let me down
and u were in the living room clownin around
it was bout 7 in the mornin and we sat there together
just me n u on the couch watchin the airplane show and nothing else mattered
to this day i still got ur toy planes and ur nolan ryan cards
and i take em out and look at em when times get hard
I know nebody reading this wont understand
cuz losing ur big brother really hurts man
i was only 6 yrs old, barely in the 1st grade
and when i heard the news my life became hazed
picture urself sittin in the middle of ur living room with ur whole family
and ur parents telling u ur brother wont come home
the 1st feeling u feel is all alone
but i was soo little and of course i cried
cuz i swear that day when my brother passed a lil bit of me died
ten yrs approaching, i cant believe its been soo long
people tell me to not think about it soo much but fuck them cuz theyre wrong
they prolly havent lost someone as close as u
and they have no idea the trauma ive been thru
everyday in the 1st grade they said i cried
cuz i missed u soo bad it hurt inside
and i know now that im becoming a man
but just because ur not here with me
doesnt mean ur not carrying me man
i miss u sooo much jeremy
-and for my best friends
meg n rach
well u know i wouldnt be here without u guys-
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[15 Aug 2004|11:13pm] |
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mood |
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not just bored, fuckin bored |
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hmmmm so the last two days ive worked
it was okay i guess
i cant complain
the best was when all the kids who know how to do the bottle room left so me n this other kid had to do it cuz stro was in dairy
so the clear bottle containers were both full so we took em to change em but we forgot to turn the machine off soooooo as u can guess stro ended up changin em and when me n stro came back there was broken bottles all over the floor cuz there was no bins to catch em
hahahah man im a dumbass
stro was pissed
i loved it
but neways i didnt do nething today after work cept whoop corey's ass in some 2k5
cuz he sucks my balls and he said he'd kill me but at halftime i was up 48-10 then we called it quits before i embarassed him even more ;)
neways im bored cuz my nigger meghan couldnt do nething and stro didnt answer me
soooo yea i tried watching gymnastics like u meg but that just didnt cut it
tho i did watch phelps in swimming
hahaha
but newho tommar is gonnna be nutty
i got to go to the dermatologist and then weightliftin
and then hopefully hangin with the coolest person on earth aka happy meal
but we'll see what happens
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[13 Aug 2004|01:02pm] |
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mood |
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blah |
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I don't mind spending everyday
Out on your corner in the pouring rain
Look for the girl with the broken smile
Ask her if she wants to stay awhile
And she will be loved
She will be loved
way to go guys im addicted to Maroon 5 now
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| hmmmm |
[13 Aug 2004|12:10am] |
| [ |
mood |
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 confused |
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This world, this world is cold
But you don't, you don't have to go
You're feeling sad you're feeling lonely
And no one seems to care
You're mother's gone and your father hits you
This pain you cannot bare
But we all bleed the same way as you do
We all have the same things to go thru
Hold on...if you feel like letting go
Hold on...it gets better than you know
Your days you say they're way too long
And your nights you can't sleep at all
And you're not sure what you're looking for
But you don't want to no more
And you're not sure what you're waiting for but you don't want to no more
But we all bleed the same way as you do
And we all have the same things to go through
Hold on...if you feel like letting go
Hold on...it gets better than you know
Don't stop looking you're one step closer
Don't stop searching it's not over...hold on
What are you looking for?
What are you waiting for?
Do you know what you're doing to me?
Go ahead...what are you waiting for?
Hold on...if you feel like letting go
Hold on...it gets better than you know
Don't stop looking you're one step closer
Don't stop searching it's not over...
Hold on...if you feel like letting go
Hold on...it gets better than you know...hold on
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| man o man |
[12 Aug 2004|12:17am] |
| [ |
mood |
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 bitchy |
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I'm not afraid
Of anything in this world
There's nothing you can throw at me
That I haven't already heard
I'm just trying to find
A decent melody
A song that I can sing
In my own company
I never thought you were a fool
But darling look at you
You gotta stand up straight
Carry your own weight
These tears are going nowhere baby
You've got to get yourself together
You've got stuck in a moment
And now you can't get out of it
Don't say that later will be better
Now you're stuck in a moment
And you can't get out of it
I will not forsake
The colors that you bring
The nights you filled with fireworks
They left you with nothing
I am still enchanted
By the light you brought to me
I listen through your ears
Through your eyes I can see
And you are such a fool
To worry like you do
I know it's tough
And you can never get enough
Of what you don't really need now
My, oh my
You've got to get yourself together
You've got stuck in a moment
And you can't get out of it
Oh love, look at you now
You've got yourself stuck in a moment
And you can't get out of it
I was unconscious, half asleep
The water is warm 'til you discover how deep
I wasn't jumping, for me it was a fall
It's a long way down to nothing at all
You've got to get yourself together
You've got stuck in a moment
And you can't get out of it
Don't say that later will be better
Now you're stuck in a moment
And you can't get out of it
And if the night runs over
And if the day won't last
And if our way should falter
Along the stony pass
And if the night runs over
And if the day won't last
And if your way should falter
Along this stony pass
It's just a moment
This time will pass
meghan is home!!!!
fuck yea tits mahgee
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[10 Aug 2004|11:43pm] |
| [ |
mood |
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bored |
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so i woke up
went to weightliftin
some blah blah blah
worked out more at home
blah blah blah
finally took a shower
blah blah
picked up trev and went to my nigger rachel's house
blah blah
her bro plays with his nipples and thinks rachel has a penis
blah blah
and rachel does play with her nipples
blah
wait
sweet
and then we left
went to FJ'S and saw Nick and kevin selling gold cards
then we got Nick crutches and then we left cuz Nick said we were ugly and were scaring ppl away
blah blah
then i got my phone that i cant use for a while
blah
then i got my nigger
then we went to trevor's
and i chilled with my nigger and dancer
and talked to my baby's momma (lauren)
then we went to FJ's again and saw charlie n stro
then we went to TB and got grandes
blah blah
then i ate it with my dancer and nigger
and then we left my dancer and my nigger and i went to my house
then i showed my nigger our new car and i gave my nigger anal in the back seat
shit i wish
my nigger is too cool for that shit
but then my nigger and my family all made fun of me
then i drove my nigger home
that was my day
love ya nigger
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[08 Aug 2004|01:38am] |
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mood |
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amused |
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Nothin’ ever stops all these thoughts n’ the pain attached to them
Sometimes I wonder why this is happenin’
It's like nothin’ I can do would distract me when
I think of how I shot myself in the back again
‘Cuz from the infinite words I can say I
Put all pain you gave to me on display
But didn't realize instead of settin’ it free I
Took what I hated and made it a part of me
It never goes away
And now
You've become a part of me
You'll always be right here
You've become a part of me
You'll always be my fear
I can't separate
Myself from what I've done
Giving up a part of me
I've let myself become you
Hearin’ your name the memories come back again
I remember when it started happenin’
I see you n’ every thought I had and then
The thoughts slowly found words attached to them
And I knew as they escaped away
I was committin’ myself to em n’ everyday
I regret sayin’ those things ‘cuz now I see that I
Took what I hated and made it a part of me
It never goes away
And now
You've become a part of me
You'll always be right here
You've become a part of me
You'll always be my fear
I can't separate
Myself from what I've done
Giving up a part of me
I've let myself become you
It never goes away
Get away from me!
Give me my space back you gotta just
Go!
Everything comes down the memories of
You!
I Kept it in without lettin’ you
Know!
I Let you go so get away from
Me!
Give me my space back you gotta just
Go!
Everything comes down the memories of
You!
I Kept it in without lettin’ you
Know!
I Let you go
And now
You've become a part of me
You'll always be right here
You've become a part of me
You'll always be my fear
I can't separate
Myself from what I've done
Giving up a part of me
I've let myself become you
I've let myself become you
I've let myself become lost inside these thoughts of you
Giving up a part of me
I've let myself become you
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[07 Aug 2004|02:41am] |
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mood |
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 lonely |
] |
I wish i could count to ten and make everything wonderful again
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[04 Aug 2004|02:51am] |
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mood |
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hmmmmm semi-sweetness |
] |
yo yo yo check it
fuck rappin bout sad shit
im sick of ppl's bitchy sissy fits
see if u really know me then u know this aint WC
so i feel like this is a moment of extreme emergency
cuz i gotta be like i was before
im sick of bein a fuckin bitch dead on the floor
i cant count on others to be there all the time
so rach n meg thanks for everything u guys r too kind
im still here for ya like u were there for me
but i gotta stop dependin on u two even tho i consider u family
so this is what im sayin
i gotta move on and no more playin
and fuck neone who brings me down
ill fuck all ur fannies while i pin u to the ground :0
theres a time and place foreverything
and this is the time to bring all my shit to an end
and if ur down with me for that then maybe if ur lucky and u pay me $30 and give me head (if ur a female)((some males possibly depending :0 )) then ill let u be my friend
fasho fasho
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